Waiting for the Phone Call…

We had a bad morning. G was in one of those moods that reminds me of a teapot, water slowly heating and boiling, building pressure until the teapot is suddenly screaming. He was never outright defiant but instead would do everything I said to it’s most annoying extreme. For example, he selected his snacks for the day – two prepackaged bars and some cheez-its. He put everything on the counter and stared at me. When I reminded him that he is responsible for bagging his snacks and getting them into his backpack, he pulled out the baggies and deliberately put everything in bags. Including the prepackaged snacks. Then he stared at me again, as if daring me to comment. As I told DH later, I decided to leave the battlefield instead of waging war and retreated to my room to get dressed without comment.

Before we left the house, I told G to collect his boots and coat. He apparently thought I should do that for him and that doing it himself would make us late for school. He then set out to ensure we would be late for school so he could say, ‘I told you so.’ He walked sloooooowly to the car, huffing and sighing the whole time. When he was buckled and were leaving the driveway he tried to actively pick the fight he had been trying to provoke. I firmly (very, very firmly) told him we would not be talking about it, we would be having a quiet drive to school. I was hoping the silent break would calm and reset him. Instead, it just turned up the heat under the teapot.

When we got to school (on time) I reminded him, as I do every day, not to crowd the door where students wait for the first bell to ring but to wait in a less crowded spot. This keeps him from bumping kids or getting mad because he was bumped, as he still misinterprets this social situation and thinks it is deliberate. G responded by going to the extreme other side of the room. I thought that was great until another student got too close and G started yelling at the student to get away. I quashed that quickly and G went back to giving me the silent treatment – because I had told him we would be quiet on the way to school and he was still holding me to that statement.

I did my very best to detach and disengage and was outwardly successful. But now I’m sitting here waiting for a phone call from the school telling me G rocketed out of control. Maybe he will and maybe he won’t, either way I can’t seem to put it aside and enjoy my morning. Which means that if he does get over his mood and have a good day, I’ll have spent my entire day in a useless state of high anxiety. Some days, I just can’t win.

Published in: on January 30, 2012 at 10:31 am  Comments (2)  

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2 CommentsLeave a comment

  1. Wow. You handle yourself amazingly with him. There were so many moments you could have done what most mothers would do and respond and you kept it together. I am taking notes!

    I hope you didn’t get that phone call you were dreading!

  2. The last few sentences really hit home with me. My son (with Asperger’s) is in second grade this year. Last year, everytime the phone rang during the school day, I just got sick to my stomach. This year I have been volunteering 20 hours a week at school and its just too much. My husband pushes me to just stay home. But sitting around and fretting and worrying isn’t very relaxing.

    VERY hard to let go!

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